Well now..

Seems like forever since I've posted in Speaking in Code.

Whats been going on since June?

Well, not much. I've been working really hard getting myself back into shape and I can happily say that I'm a an impressive (for me) 130lbs. That's a nice 40lbs lighter than I was a year ago. Ive even toned up! I haven't been this toned since field hockey in high school.

I made a new friend. Her name is Diana and she's an officer's wife. She's also a Spanish teacher. She bought her first house on her own when she was 22. Which is very impressive to me! This girls got it all figured out. She's going for her masters and is in the process of selling her house.

She lives in this God forsaken place, too! But not for very long. She'll be gone in December when her husband gets his MOS.

Which really makes me think...

The military life is very different from civilian.

In civilian life, you go to your normal job, get married and have kids later, and normally stay planted in the same state you grew up in.

In military life, people tend to get married very young (I was 20, Aaron 21) and have kids, very young.(I had Noah when I was 22) This is the kind of lifestyle that I know and that I am used to.
And I have never thought any different of it until I met Diana.

She had her whole life figured out. And now it's turned upside down by the Marine Corps. I mean, she lives here at Sky Terrace, (Google the reviews for it, you'll understand why this is awful) is selling her house back in New Jersey, putting her school on hold.. just to live this hectic life of a military wife. I have to give her props! If I had my whole life, career and everything planned and then my Husband decided to join the military, I dont think I would cut it. Id say, see ya later buddy.. I'm doing my own thing.

Luckily, I didnt have my whole life planned out, and still don't. I'm going to follow Aaron where ever he goes. I'll raise our children and keep up the house. I'll take them to football practice and walk the dog. I'll do my best to be the best Mother and Wife that I can be because in all honesty, I have nothing going for me.

I'm not very smart, (I'm surprised that I even made it through highschool..And I probably wouldn't have if I didn't go to a private school in 11th grade.) I have no desire to go back to school for anything, and if you asked me what I wanted to be when I was little, I seriously cannot tell you because I never even thought of it. Or, I never even thought anything was interesting enough for me to presue.

Thats my problem. I have no goals, career wise that is. There is nothing that I want to be besides a wife and mother. Aaron keeps telling me to take online classes.. I just dont want to. Does that make me unmotivated? I don't know. It does make me feel like my life doesn't have a purpose (other than wife and mother) career wise.. I feel like I should be doing something. I should be in school or have a job..

Anyway,I don't know where I was going with that. I just see Diana and she's got it all down pat. I look and my self and say, "what could you have been?"

But would I change it? I don't know. Some things, yes. I probably would have stayed in college and got a 2 year degree. I probably would have waited a little longer to have kids. But am I happy the way things turned out? You bet ya! I love my boys and I love our little military life. I love that my husband has stepped up and become a man and provides for this family. He's the best father to our boys and the best husband to me.

So, in short, I just want to say, "Thank you Marine Corps for making me what I am today.A Mother, a Wife, a Patriot. I do have days when I second guess my decisions, but in the end, this is the life I chose and I wouldn't have it any other way."